Life Made Lovely: 2016

A letter to Hazel

First of all, I started this blog 6 months ago for Hazels 18 month birthday and never finished, so the first half is from then and the second half today June 12th 2016.

Sometime in December
There is so much to say about you. You, my little one and a half year old, you are something special. Every mother wonders how they are going to love another child like their first, but it happens and it happens in the most natural way. I love you fiercely. I look at you sometimes and am completely overjoyed, I sit and watch you do the cute little things you do and think, how lucky am I to be this little girls mama. I love you Hazel Jane.

You. Lets talk about you, which is something I could do all day long. I could simply say you are a lovable, gentle, carefree, fun loving, happy, hot headed, sweet, adorable little girl, but you know I'm going to go into more detail than that. You have this smile that we all can't stop talking about. It's honestly a smile that makes everyone in the room say "oh my gosh, that smile, what a sweet, sweet smile." You could probably get away with murder with that smile. You're so happy. All the time. I wish I could take all the credit, but it's just you, you are a happy little soul and everyone around you notices. You love to love. You adore your family. Your family adores you. You're a giver. A giver of hugs, kisses, laughs, You are a lover of animals. There has never been a kitty cat or dog that you haven't squealed over. Even the fake ones. Today you found one of Lolas old dog toys that makes a barking noise and you were in love. You smiled and carried that puppy around all day. Your sister cried and wanted nothing to do with that dog. I love seeing your different personalities, but the animal thing, that's a special Hazel thing.

{I hope you never lose your sense of wonder}

June 12th, 2016 My two year old Hazel Jane.

Funny how some things stay the same and some things never change. You're still a happy little girl, with a sweet smile, that makes us swoon. You are also a very, very serious little girl, with a look that could kill. You and those furrowed eye brows, which we now call "the hazel look" The first thing that comes to my mind about you is.. happiness, you make us so happy. You give this family a little piece of fun and love that we would be without if it weren't for you. You keep us busy, you are my wild child, there is no doubt about that. You are daring and brave and love to give your mommy and daddy heart attacks daily. I'm trying my best to let you fly, to not hover and let you do your own thing. You love to love. You love your sister so much, you are always thinking of her. If your hands are full, you with reach them out to her and make sure hers are never empty. You are stubborn, so stubborn. Your favorite word is no and you use it in the most stern way possible. You're polite 98% of the time. You march to the beat of your own drum. You like things the way you like them. You are our first cuddle bug! That is when aren't in motion. You're always in motion. You never stop, you love to run and play and climb and jump and just have fun. You are curious and not afraid of anything. I hope that never changes, but if it does, I hope you know you're always safe in my arms. You love to learn and explore. You also like to jump out of your crib, which is why you are now in a big girl bed, congrats! You are friendly, you are kind, you are giving, unless its your bunny, you're never giving that thing away. We love you so much it hurts. We look at you and our heart burst with pride and joy. Hazel thank you for being our little girl, Happy 2nd birthday my happy hazelnut.

Will's Birth Story!

Just like the other birth stories, before I start, I promise to keep this as clean and free of TMI as possible. But keep in mind you are reading a birth story and in reality almost everything about giving birth is too much information. Oh, and it’s long and cheesy, sorry about that.

On Saturday, March 12 around noon, Jake and I had just put the girls down for a nap, we were going to visit the Easter bunny when they woke up, but God had different plans for us that day. I noticed my mucus plug had come out, yeah I know, gross, but it happens. I had never had that happen before so I didn't really know what was going to happen next. What I was hoping would come next, did, pain! I started cramping right away. I didn't want to get my hopes up, but they were. I started feeling like this was it! Then naturally I started googling mucus plug. Like I didn't already know the answer. "you could either go into labor right away or two weeks later". So I just walked around and hoped the cramping would turn into something more. Contractions were about 10 minutes apart at this time. Then I decided to lie down and hope they would get painful enough to wake me up and they did! Around 2:00 I woke up and they were still there a little closer together and a little more painful. At this point, I decided we better call my parents to come over, I figured we would probably be heading to the hospital soon. At 4:00 I decided it was time to head out. I didn't know how fast this labor was going to come and I wanted be safe and sound. So we kissed the girls, grabbed the bags and headed out the door with happy, excited hearts!

We get to the exam room around 6:00. Yes, 6:00 We had to make a stop for some fast food for the hubby, gross. I think he just wanted to tell the drive through lady, his wife was in labor. Then of course they mess up his order and he didn't even eat, sorry babe, can't leave that part out of the birth story.
So, they don't usually admit you until you're around 4 cm and I had been at a 2, for a week or so now, so I was hoping, praying, crying, I was more. Much to my disappointment the nurse says 2. Here come the first set of tears. I was sad, confused, disappointed. The nurse told us to walk around for an hour and come back to hopefully see some progress. So we head to the cafeteria of course, Jake never got his dinner and I was hungry at the point. I was now stopping in my tracks every contraction.

As we are eating, I break down at the table. My eyes start to fill up and I tell Jake I am not leaving the hospital, no matter what. I knew I was in labor and baby was coming soon! We get back to the exam room at 7:00 and she checks me again. 4 cm! Yes! I can't express the feelings at this point. Pure joy, relief, happiness. More tears, but happy ones this time. And off to the labor and delivery room we go!

We got all settled in, now here come the nerves. This is it, I knew the pain I was about to endure and I was scared out of my mind. The only thing keeping me sane was knowing I was about to meet our son. Contractions did what they are supposed to do and I naturally progressed over the next couple of hours. I didn't sit or lie down, I don't want to when I'm in labor, its not what feels comfortable to me, so I paced. I paced the room and during every contraction, I would stop, close my eyes and lean on something, usually Jake.

Around 9:00, I could tell things were picking up fast so I asked to be checked, first time I was checked since 7:00 at 4 cm. I was 6-7 cm . Oh boy, here it comes. What I loved most about this birth experience is that I never had to get into bed, the nurse came in about three times and while I was standing would hold the monitor up to my stomach and during one contraction, would make sure the baby was not in distress. No IVs, nothing. During one of my more painful contractions, the lady, pushing next door, let out the most painful scream imaginable and I lost it. I started to sob and repeat, "I'm so scared" over and over again. Jake just held me and kept reassuring me, it was going to be okay, we were going to meet our son, very soon. Which really does give you some comfort.

Right after I was checked, things started getting serious. I was in transition and felt the urge to push. I got up in the bed and got on my hands and knees (thats what felt natural to me) and pushed and my water broke, all over the bed. Jake and I both yelled CALL THE DR.! (If you aren't familiar with my last experience, as soon as that happened last time, 5 minutes later Hazel was born and the Dr. did not make it). Nurse said Dr. M would be there any minute. I think I said something along the lines of, "he better be!" Whoops, forgive me, I'm not really myself in transition. A couple more contractions and back up in bed I went, it was definitely time for this baby to come and in walks Dr. M! yayyy!! I love my Dr. by the way, coolest guy ever. In he walks, with a big smile on his face and I'm sure my face looked the same, well until the next contraction anyway. He checks for baby and he couldn't see him yet, but felt his head. I could tell by his voice, that he wasn't that far away, and this could either take awhile or I could push with all my might and get this baby out. So that is what I did, I wanted the pain to stop and to meet my son of course. So with three, very very very hard pushes, Dr. M tells Jake to deliver his baby and he did! Jake got to deliver Will and hand him to me. Unfortunately, we don't have any of the delivery on video like the other two, because our videographer (my sister) was out of town, and Jake set the go pro down because he gets very caught up in the moment, as you can imagine, but it was, excuse the cheesiness, magical, we were on cloud nine, in love, and overflowing with joy. I'm writing this down, so that hopefully this story never leaves my memory.

Jake handed me my baby boy and I got to hold him as long as I wanted and thats what I did. About an hour later, I handed him over to the nurse, who was amazing by the way, for his measurements. Naturally, Jake and I couldn't stop smiling, our son was here, healthy, beautiful and just like that we were a family of five. The nurse quickly measured Will, handed him back to me and I handed him off to his daddy ,and first the first time Jake got to hold his first born son, not holding back any tears, completely in love.