A letter to Hazel

A letter to Hazel

First of all, I started this blog 6 months ago for Hazels 18 month birthday and never finished, so the first half is from then and the second half today June 12th 2016.

Sometime in December
      There is so much to say about you.  You, my little one and a half year old, you are something special.  Every mother wonders how they are going to love another child like their first, but it happens and it happens in the most natural way.  I love you fiercely. I look at you sometimes and am completely overjoyed, I sit and watch you do the cute little things you do and think, how lucky am I to be this little girls mama. I love you Hazel Jane.

You. Lets talk about you, which is something I could do all day long. I could simply say you are a lovable, gentle, carefree, fun loving, happy, hot headed, sweet, adorable little girl, but you know I'm going to go into more detail than that.  You have this smile that we all can't stop talking about.  It's honestly a smile that makes everyone in the room say "oh my gosh, that smile, what a sweet, sweet smile."  You could probably get away with murder with that smile.  You're so happy. All the time.  I wish I could take all the credit, but it's just you, you are a happy little soul and everyone around you notices. You love to love. You adore your family. Your family adores you.  You're a giver. A giver of hugs, kisses, laughs,  You are a lover of animals.  There has never been a kitty cat or dog that you haven't squealed over.  Even the fake ones. Today you found one of Lolas old dog toys that makes a barking noise and you were in love. You smiled and carried that puppy around all day. Your sister cried and wanted nothing to do with that dog.  I love seeing your different personalities, but the animal thing, that's a special Hazel thing.

                                       

                                              {I hope you never lose your sense of wonder}

 June 12th, 2016 My two year old Hazel Jane.

     Funny how some things stay the same and some things never change. You're still a happy little girl, with a sweet smile, that makes us swoon. You are also a very, very serious little girl, with a look that could kill. You and those furrowed eye brows, which we now call  "the hazel look" The first thing that comes to my mind about you is.. happiness, you make us so happy. You give this family a little piece of fun and love that we would be without if it weren't for you. You keep us busy, you are my wild child, there is no doubt about that. You are daring and brave and love to give your mommy and daddy heart attacks daily. I'm trying my best to let you fly, to not hover and let you do your own thing.  You love to love. You love your sister so much, you are always thinking of her. If your hands are full, you with reach them out to her and make sure hers are never empty. You are stubborn, so stubborn. Your favorite word is no and you use it in the most stern way possible. You're polite 98% of the time.  You march to the beat of your own drum. You like things the way you like them. You are our first cuddle bug! That is when aren't in motion. You're always in motion. You never stop, you love to run and play and climb and jump and just have fun. You are curious and not afraid of anything. I hope that never changes, but if it does, I hope you know you're always safe in my arms. You love to learn and explore. You also like to jump out of your crib, which is why you are now in a big girl bed, congrats! You are friendly, you are kind, you are giving, unless its your bunny, you're never giving that thing away.  We love you so much it hurts. We look at you and our heart burst with pride and joy. Hazel thank you for being our little girl, Happy 2nd birthday my happy hazelnut.

Will's Birth Story

                                                               Will's Birth Story!

Just like the other birth stories, before I start, I promise to keep this as clean and free of TMI as possible. But keep in mind you are reading a birth story and in reality almost everything about giving birth is too much information. Oh, and it’s long and cheesy, sorry about that.


 On Saturday, March 12 around noon, Jake and I had just put the girls down for a nap, we were going to visit the Easter bunny when they woke up, but God had different plans for us that day. I noticed my mucus plug had come out, yeah I know, gross, but it happens.  I had never had that happen before so I didn't really know what was going to happen next. What I was hoping would come next, did, pain! I started cramping right away.  I didn't want to get my hopes up, but they were. I started feeling like this was it! Then naturally I started googling mucus plug. Like I didn't already know the answer. "you could either go into labor right away or two weeks later". So I just walked around and hoped the cramping would turn into something more. Contractions were about 10 minutes apart at this time. Then I decided to lie down and hope they would get painful enough to wake me up and they did! Around 2:00 I woke up and they were still there a little closer together and a little more painful. At this point, I decided we better call my parents to come over, I figured we would probably be heading to the hospital soon. At 4:00 I decided it was time to head out. I didn't know how fast this labor was going to come and I wanted be safe and sound. So we kissed the girls, grabbed the bags and headed out the door with happy, excited hearts!

We get to the exam room around 6:00. Yes, 6:00 We had to make a stop for some fast food for the hubby, gross.  I think he just wanted to tell the drive through lady, his wife was in labor. Then of course they mess up his order and he didn't even eat, sorry babe, can't leave that part out of the birth story. 
So, they don't usually admit you until you're around 4 cm and I had been at a 2, for a week or so now, so I was hoping, praying, crying, I was more. Much to my disappointment the nurse says 2. Here come the first set of tears. I was sad, confused, disappointed.  The nurse told us to walk around for an hour and come back to hopefully see some progress. So we head to the cafeteria of course, Jake never got his dinner and I was hungry at the point. I was now stopping in my tracks every contraction. 

As we are eating, I break down at the table. My eyes start to fill up and I tell Jake I am not leaving the hospital, no matter what. I knew I was in labor and baby was coming soon!  We get back to the exam room at 7:00 and she checks me again. 4 cm! Yes! I can't express the feelings at this point. Pure joy, relief, happiness. More tears, but happy ones this time. And off to the labor and delivery room we go! 

 We got all settled in, now here come the nerves. This is it, I knew the pain I was about to endure and I was scared out of my mind. The only thing keeping me sane was knowing I was about to meet our son. Contractions did what they are supposed to do and I naturally progressed over the next couple of hours. I didn't sit or lie down, I don't want to when I'm in labor, its not what feels comfortable to me, so I paced. I paced the room and during every contraction, I would stop, close my eyes and lean on something, usually Jake. 

 Around 9:00, I could tell things were picking up fast so I asked to be checked, first time I was checked since 7:00 at 4 cm. I was  6-7 cm . Oh boy, here it comes.  What I loved most about this birth experience is that I never had to get into bed, the nurse came in about three times and while I was standing would hold the monitor up to my stomach and during one contraction, would make sure the baby was not in distress. No IVs, nothing. During one of my more painful contractions, the lady, pushing next door, let out the most painful scream imaginable and I lost it. I started to sob and repeat, "I'm so scared" over and over again. Jake just held me and kept reassuring me, it was going to be okay, we were going to meet our son, very soon. Which really does give you some comfort. 

Right after I was checked, things started getting serious. I was in transition and felt the urge to push. I got up in the bed and got on my hands and knees (thats what felt natural to me) and pushed and my water broke, all over the bed. Jake and I both yelled CALL THE DR.! (If you aren't familiar with my last experience, as soon as that happened last time, 5 minutes later Hazel was born and the Dr. did not make it). Nurse said Dr. M would be there any minute. I think I said something along the lines of, "he better be!" Whoops, forgive me, I'm not really myself in transition.  A couple more contractions and back up in bed I went, it was definitely time for this baby to come and in walks Dr. M! yayyy!! I love my Dr. by the way, coolest guy ever. In he walks, with a big smile on his face and I'm sure my face looked the same, well until the next contraction anyway.  He checks for baby and he couldn't see him yet, but felt his head.  I could tell by his voice, that he wasn't that far away, and this could either take awhile or I could push with all my might and get this baby out. So that is what I did, I wanted the pain to stop and to meet my son of course. So with three, very very very hard pushes,  Dr. M tells Jake to deliver his baby and he did! Jake got to deliver Will and hand him to me. Unfortunately, we don't have any of the delivery on video like the other two, because our videographer (my sister) was out of town, and Jake set the go pro down because he gets very caught up in the moment, as you can imagine, but it was, excuse the cheesiness, magical, we were on cloud nine, in love, and overflowing with joy.  I'm writing this down, so that hopefully this story never leaves my memory. 

Jake handed me my baby boy and I got to hold him as long as I wanted and thats what I did. About an hour later, I handed him over to the nurse, who was amazing by the way, for his measurements. Naturally, Jake and I couldn't stop smiling, our son was here, healthy, beautiful and just like that we were a family of five. The nurse quickly measured Will, handed him back to me and I handed him off to his daddy ,and first the first time Jake got to hold his first born son, not holding back any tears, completely in love. 

William James Frazier was born on March 12th at 10:47 pm, 6 lbs and 3oz, 19 inches long. 

Lola goes to preschool

Lola's First Day of Two School!

       Today, I put my little girls backpack on her, took her hand and walked her to her preschool classroom. I guess neither of us were as ready as I thought we were for it. As I kissed her goodbye, the tears starting pouring down my little girls cheeks and then she grabbed my neck as tight as she possibly could. I knew if I stayed with her any longer I wouldn't be able to keep myself from having my own meltdown.  I could feel the lump in my throat and my own tears starting to form. I had to get out of there before I lost it as well.  I told her I would be back to get her soon, have fun and that mommy loved her and then I closed the door behind me.  Then I sat outside the classroom until I heard the sobbing stop, which was the hardest part. It was bittersweet. I'm so excited for her to start this new journey. Two school is only two hours, twice a week so I don't feel like I'm losing my baby, but it's still an emotional experience. Then I drove away, and there may have been a few more tears for mommy, but give me a break, I'm a pregnant hormonal woman right now!

Sissy had to sneak in for a couple pics ; )

   When I picked her up, the teacher came out, told us parents how great the kids did and explained their first day.  They painted, colored, gathered round for a book, had some animal crackers for snack, all of which Lola told me about herself on the way home. Then the teacher opened the door and there she was, gathered around in a circle of tiny kids with their backpacks on. It was the cutest thing. Lola ran up to me with the biggest smile and squeezed my legs, like she would never let me go. The teacher told me, Lola did great after she calmed down, she used the potty and loved painting. She also asked me about a "Froggy?" Whoops, mommy didn't send Lola to school with her best friend froggy, which was obviously a huge mistake.  I found two adorable little colored pictures, tucked inside her backpack, which I'll probably keep for all of time.

I know Lola will thrive in school. I'm so excited for her to make new friends, and learn new things. The teachers at Learning Tree are great and I feel so blessed to be on this little journey with this kid. Big things are in store for you baby girl. This is just the beginning, I know it. You will go far.

"The more that you read, the more things you will know.  

The more that you learn, the more places you'll go."  

-Dr. Seuss

Baby Frazier 3.0 Coming soon!

Baby Frazier 3.0 is on his/her way! Coming March 2015!

It's true, we are pregnant again and we are so excited!!! Am I nervous to soon be outnumbered by little ones? Absolutely! But that doesn't mean I am completly overjoyed about bringing another adorable little Frazier baby into this World. Our wonderful family is growing and we are on cloud 9. Our daughters bring so much happiness into our lives, I can't imagine adding a third! Eeeeppp! So exciting! Please help us pray for a safe and healthy pregnancy and baby.



Questions and Answers.
Yes, I really made questions and answers for all of you nosy people out there, like me. 



When are you due?
March 18th

Was this planned?
Yes, sort of.

Are you finding out the sex of the baby this time?
Yes, we are!

Why, when you loved not finding out the first two times?!
Well, yes we did love the surprise with the first two, but why not switch it up and see what it's like the other way. Honestly, Jake doesn't want to find out, but I talked him into it. I really just think it will be fun doing it the the other way and curiosity has gotten the best of me!

How far apart with they be?
21 Months. Lola and Hazel are almost 20 months and we really love that age gap. It worked out really well, the first time, lets hope it does this time as well!

Are you guys trying to start a reality T.V. show?
No, we are not the Duggers, please don't compare us to the Duggers. We want a big family to grow old with, family is everything to us. And our kids freaking rock.

Are you trying for a boy?
No we are not trying for a boy. We honestly would be perfectly happy with either sex. Would it be fun to have a different sex, yeah!  but our girls are truly the sweetest things on Earth and adding another little girl, well, that would be pretty awesome! We shall see!

Do you have names picked out already?
I think so, for a boy. and no clue for a girl.

Are you done after this?
Who knows, probably not. ha ha

Hello again

Hello again! 

So, I'm thinking about starting up my blog again, no clue why now, but why not?
It's probably the crazy, busiest I have ever been in my life, so perfect time right?! Plus, I kind of miss writing, not that I'm good at it or anything, but its nice to have a place to share life's little moments.  Life is so fun right now with my two little stinkers and I miss writing down and recording our crazy life.  So stay tuned, or not, doesn't matter, I'm still going to blabber on.  Have a lovely day friends! 

p.s. I just noticed that my last blog draft is Hazels birth story, so maybe I'll try to finish it, its a pretty interesting one, with her almost falling out onto the floor and everything! ; )

Hazel Birth Story

Hazels Birth Story

Here I am, 41 weeks and two days pregnant and still no baby.  I had a Dr. Appt. the day before and Dr. said I was almost a two 80 percent effaced. This, just like every week before this wasn't very good news. I could not believe this baby was still inside my belly.



The night before our baby was born, I went to bed with some pains, praying this was it. I didn't even want to tell Jake, because I didn't want to jinx it.  About in the morning I was woken up by a sharp labor pain. I got really excited, could this really be it?! I told myself I was going to go back to sleep and see if another wakes me up. An hour later, I was woken up again by another sharp pain. This time I started timing them and they were minutes apart. Holy cow! So thats when I woke Jake up. He had an important day at school the next day, so I didn't want to head to the hospital unless we knew for sure this was it, plus I wanted to labor at home as much as possible. We went downstairs and started to play Mario, thats when we noticed the contractions were getting closer and closer, almost 4 minutes apart and starting to hurt bad. Oh my gosh, that came fast. We called my dad and he rushed over to stay with Lola. We grabbed our bags and were out the door. The entire way to the hospital my contractions were timing about 7 minutes apart, they starting slowing down. By the time we got to the hospital and into the room where you wait to be checked in they really slowed down. I started to freak out. The doctor (hospital Dr.)  came in and told me I could go back home if I wanted, that the contractions had slowed down and if I wanted to have a natural birth than there was no point of me staying. I told him that I needed a minute and when he left the room I just broke down. I was so disappointed, I knew what I felt and I didn't want to leave. The nurse came in and saw me upset. I told her that I didn't want to leave, I was pretty sure I was in labor and she told me she would call my doctor and see if he thought it would be okay if I got checked in and stayed. I knew that if I was to get checked in then I was going to have this baby, rather it was on its on or if they would have to get things going themselves. At that point, I didn't care, I was having this baby today and I was pretty dang sure this baby was on it's way, no matter what they said. So they called my doctor, who happens to be the coolest Dr. ever and he told them to let me check in and see if I start progressing again. Oh my gosh, I was soooo relieved and so excited! As soon as we got checked into our room and I got relaxed my contractions were back! I knew it. I believe the stress of me being so worried about it being false labor had slowed down my labor. Once I was clam and relaxed, this baby was ready! We got checked in about 10:00 am.








Once the nurse checked me again, I was at a 7. I knew I had hit transition. I was having hot/cold flashes, my legs were shaking and I pretty much thought I was going to die.  I kept looking up at Jake and telling him "I can't do this" The poor guy didn't know what to say, you could tell he just felt bad for me. He told me he was worried that since I was late he thought this baby was going to be too big for me to deliver and maybe I really couldn't do it, but of course he never said that out loud. He just held me through every contraction and cheered me on.  I suddenly felt the urge to push. I was standing of course, I do all my laboring standing. Laying in bed and laboring is not for me. I had another contraction and BOOM, my water broke all over the floor. The nurse rushed over to me. I think I remember her saying something along the lines of okay, "Page the Dr!" and then asked me if I could make it into the bed as she is holding her hands underneath me, as if she was ready to catch a baby. I'm pretty sure you could see the head and at that point I wasn't sure I could make it in the bed, I was in so much paint, but between contraction I managed to hop up in bed and when the next contraction hit, I had to push. My Dr. was not there yet, but a couple EMTs and the I'm pretty sure a Dr. was there. there were so many unfamiliar faces around, but I didn't care. I had to push, and this baby was coming! A couple pushes later and there SHE was. This itty bitty 6 lbs 6 oz, beautiful baby girl. I still got to hold her right away and all that natural jazz, even though my Dr. wasn't there. He showed about about 5 minutes too late, but the poor guy tried. This little girl came fast once I hit a 7. There was my baby, miss Hazel Jane. I think I remember smiling and saying "she looks like Lola." "Lola has a sister!" I was so excited, they had each other.

40 week bump check

40 Weeks

June 3, 2014

how far along:  40 weeks

size of baby:   

maternity clothes:  Yes, please. 

weight gain: 27  Pounds 131 lbs total

symptoms: False Labor, tons of pelvic pain and pressure

looking forward to: Giving Birth!

exercise: 

cravings/aversions:  craving burgers!  

movement: 

sleep: Waking up to pee a lot and hoping my water breaks!

gender: boy?

worries: That I will have to be induced 

what's different this time: I'm still pregnant!  

milestones: Made it to my DUE DATE! 

best moment this week: Keeping my sanity.